Why you don't talk to me?
by Tatou27
Summary: A oneshot focused on Cuddy's feelings,doubts,fears towards the love of her life. A Cuddy of season 5. Comments are welcome. Dedicated to a special person.


**This story is dedicated to a person that I love so much. I only wish that he could understand that.**

**So, this story focuses on Cuddy and her emotions, fears, doubts -all regarding the love of her life- A oneshot about the Cuddy of season 5 -especially towards the end-**  
**Everyone enjoy, and review..**

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Why you don't talk to me, now that the time is right? Relieve me from the pain to be away from you. Can't you see that I cannot see? Cause I'm blind. Blind for the rest of the world, for everything that are supposed to matter. I cannot hear you speaking, cause I'm deaf. That's the only reason to explain why I still haven't figured out the right way to the center of the labyrinth. That's right. I don't want to get out, I need to get inside.

Why you don't talk to me, now that the time is right? You are like a pendulum performing a non-damped oscillation. Logic is your equilibrium position and your inner feelings the extreme ones. In your negative extreme position you keep all the suffering, the pain while in the positive you store your spontaneity, your laugh, your restriction's free self. But you always try to find your balance. It may take some time, but you always return to your balance state and it's then when my heart beats with the maximum speed. That's what I'm waiting for.

I cannot speak, cause I'm at a loss for words. Every time that I look into your eyes. And I'm here now, waiting right next to my cellphone, to feel it vibrating and I'll know it's you. I can always feel when it's you, asking me for something crazy. Why you don't talk to me, now that I cannot speak? It would make our lives easier, just to know that you are out there, somewhere, and that you care. You have a strange way of showing it and it's not every time obvious or understood. The man who lives for solving puzzles, is a great puzzle of his own. Why am I not surprised? Oh..who am I try to joke? I wouldn't want it any other way, because then it wouldn't be you.

The one who I fell in love with..

Why you don't talk to me? I cannot taste the happiness of love and be loved, truly and unconditionally. I cannot taste the comfort and the fulfillment of finding what's missing from me. Maybe all these are because I cannot touch your mind, heart and soul? You are waiting for someone to solve your puzzle. That silent enigma. And.. it seems that I am not the one, even if in a twisted way, you have almost solved mine.. and complete myself.

My mind confronts my heart -or what is left of it-. You don't talk to me and the time is no more right. Anger, doubt, disappointment, resignation of hope. For whatever his reasons he doesn't make that step which will change our lives. Should I wait? How can he be the one for me and I not the one for him? One of us must be wrong..

Up in the vast and dark sky, there is still the sight of yesterday's full moon. And it talks to me. Oh, my luna. Sing to me and take me with you, to the place where dreams come true. Infinity, eternity, the cycle. What you are, what I have thought you to be, brings tears in my eyes. Because now I sense how small and meaningless I am. And above all.. incomplete.

Hopes and fears, what are they? Just whispers in the night. The morning will be all gone. The sunlight will bring back the silence and my inner feelings will remain hidden till the dark falls, and I'll be alone.. again.. as always. *melancholic laugh* Every time I see you smile, earth stands still. Nothing moves, nothing sounds, except of you. It makes me happy and I know that nothing else matters and I gain strength. I want to scream that I "love you" in more ways than you can imagine. But I don't, and don't ask me why..

Why you don't... why you... why? And I shall remain here, between dream and reality, wrong and right, love and indifference. Everything slowly drifts into complete silence...

The phone is ringing.

Oh my.. my heart is beating so fast and the familiar sense of butterflies in my stomach is back. It's him. I know..

_I need to cut someone's brain..._

and so, I smile.

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_To G._


End file.
